Things I'm Doing Instead of Writing

Playing so many rounds of Pepper Panic that the Royal Games admins should probably start checking on me.

Replacing imagination with procrastination in this song from Disney World.

Thinking about my coworker who will full-on vogue at the slightest provocation and how watching him is literally my favorite thing in the world.

Catching up on my correspondence, which I also put off for an unreasonable amount of time.

Debating what I should read for so long that I end up reading nothing.

Compulsively checking my e-mail even though I only ever get messages from retailers.

Scrolling through Facebook until there is nothing left for me to see.

***

Neglecting to compose even the simplest blog posts is becoming second nature to me. I hope that I can be better this year and get back on some kind of schedule, even if it's just once a month. That way, I'm still putting my work into the world even when no one else wants to publish my writing. Because honestly, if I don't keep going, I might die.

-Cate-

New Year, New Playlist: 2019

I had a tradition on my first blog, What We Covet, of starting each new year off with a playlist of music I intend to take with me throughout the year. As with the previous lists, the songs were culled from my current collection. Most aren't recent, but they certainly sound good to me, and that's really the goal of any playlist I ever make. They come to you in no particular order. I hope you'll check them out, if you're not already familiar with them. Enjoy!

***

 

There's only one song this year, y'all, and it feels appropriate to share it the day that our new Congress is sworn in: "Meltdown."

 

Just listen to the lyrics. They'll tell you how I feel.

 

-Cate-

Dystopias R Us?

Earlier this year, I claimed to have reread my all-time favorite, Fahrenheit 451. But the fact is, I did no such thing.

Let me be clear: I began my reread, and I got halfway through the book. The reason I posted about finishing that reread is because I thought for sure that I would be done with it by the time the post went live. The reason I didn't finish my reread--and still have not, all these months later--is slightly more complicated.

The thing is, even my beloved book is tainted at the moment. We're living in a world where our President is allowed to get away with almost anything, from arbitrarily revoking press passes to refusing to hold a so-called ally accountable for a despicable murder, from blaming California for its own deadly fires to skipping out on ceremonies commemorating World War I. I could go on, but I think I don't need to, as you've all lived through the same issues.

America, I'm sad to say, feels like it's turning into a dystopia. At the very least, it's become a sideshow laughingstock. And when you see this sort of tarnishing firsthand, it's so tough to continue reading about it on the page; fiction becomes too factual to stomach.

I realize this is a bleak outlook, and I hope to feel better about the world soon. In order for that to happen, though, we have to pull together as a country and demand better of our leaders. A bit of that did happen earlier this month, when voters (including myself) raised their voices at the polls and elected many new Representatives, governors, and other officials to displace those currently in power. If this new group of lawmakers can band together and effect some positive change, I'll be glad. 

In the meantime, I continue to resist, and I encourage you to do the same.

-Cate-

Good Things for Autumn

There is something about fall that I love. The leaves changing color, the cool rain, the earlier nightfall, and the fashion choices are all excellent. It's a cozy time for me, more comfortable than summer and winter, more fun than spring. Plus, it's Halloween season, which makes me so happy.

Like Martha Stewart before me, I wanted to share a few thinks I think are great for fall. This is, of course, a completely subjective list, but I hope it's one that inspires you!

1) Loaf Cakes

To match the denser feeling that comes with fall, why not whip up a loaf cake? They come in all sorts of flavors, including those seasonal classics, apple and pumpkin. You can even match the shape of the loaf to the season if you so desire!

2) Walking Trails

I'm not the biggest fan of being outside, but it's difficult to pass up the chance to step on some crunchy leaves and experience the turning of the colors. The best way to do this, in my opinion, is to either take a drive down a tree-lined corridor or get yourself to a walking trail in a local park. Your state's Department of Natural Resources can give you great ideas about where to do this.

3) Tiffany & Co. Perfume

Recently, I decided it was time to find a new fall fragrance. You can always go with the typical classics from Bath and Body Works--something like Warm Vanilla Sugar is good, and they have an ever-changing range of seasonal scents. Or, if you're looking for something more sophisticated, as I was, you can try this perfume, with patchouli and musk at its base, to give you that warm feeling.

4) Fahrenheit 451

Y'all should have seen this one coming. There is no book that says FALL to me like Fahrenheit. This is the perfect season to read (or, in my case, reread) Bradbury's classic.

What would you add to your own list of  fall essentials? And how do you feel about the debate about fall versus autumn?

Whichever side you come down on, I hope you have an excellent season!

-Cate-

Images via here and here.

Why I Didn't Report

This post is for LB, who did report.

I've never been raped, for which I'm grateful.* But I have been sexually harassed on several occasions, been made uncomfortable by male attention (in a way unconnected to my anxiety), and thrice been touched against my will, all by different people, and in each instance as an adult.** So now I'm here to list the reasons why I didn't report.

1) Because feeling squeamish during an encounter isn't enough of a reason to make a claim against someone.

2) Because I was conditioned by society to believe that I should be flattered by the attention.

3) Because I brushed it off as a symptom of his drunkenness. 

4) Because part of me wanted it, and I thought that made the whole thing okay.

5) Because I was afraid of the consequences of saying no.

6) Because he was sensitive and vulnerable and I didn't want to make it worse for him.

None of these people are in my life anymore, although only by circumstance in all but the last case. Him, I had to cut out because of his terrible behavior (on this front and others). And, in all but the last two cases, I have forgiven the transgression.***

Because it's tough, navigating these situations. I can't know how many of them were one-off incidents borne of alcohol or a moment of bad judgment, and that makes it seem easier to just move past an awkward, uncomfortable, or inappropriate moment. Also, when the incident is minor, moving past it feels like a better choice than making a fuss. And when you have to see some of these people every day of your life, learning to live with the situation makes survival more possible.

However. 

Having said all that, I do think that speaking up and defending yourself is important. But having said THAT, I completely understand why some--maybe most--survivors of harassment or assault choose to bury the pain, embarrassment, and shame.

I believe Dr. Ford. I believe all of my friends who have made the decision not to report. I believe the women (and men) who have reported and been brushed aside, ignored, and scapegoated. Because I've been there, too.

-Cate-

* The fact that I feel I have to express my gratitude for not having my bodily autonomy violated too badly is another discussion for another time.

** I'm so lucky not to have experienced any of this as a child. Such a sin against minors is literally the most disgusting thing I can imagine.

*** Whether I should or not.

Summer Book Report 2018

Y'all. It's been seven months since I blogged, so #failcatefail. But that's not even the worst part: I barely have a post to write here at all.

This wasn't the greatest summer for my reading life. I've been a slacker all year, in fact. Since January, I've only read 20 new-to-me books, although to be fair to myself, I also reread the entire Harry Potter series in January, which is an accomplishment in itself. And I did buy a few (read: 20 or more) volumes to read in the future! These are the stores I've been to recently to accomplish such a feat.

- In September, I returned to McLean & Eakin in Petoskey, MI. This is one of my favorite bookstores, which is saying something, as I love most bookstores I visit.

- Also in September, I went to Between the Covers in Harbor Springs, MI. This was my first time at that store. It's small but has a good selection and reminded me a lot of Lorelei Books in Vicksburg, MS.

Sadly, I have yet to go to any other stores, except for my local Barnes & Noble (I know, okay?). However, I should have the opportunity in October to go to both Brilliant Books in Traverse City, MI, which I already know, and Horizon Books, also in TC, which I've never shopped at before. If I have the time, I'll also stop at Landmark Books in TC.

In other bookstore news: for those of you who don't know, the Lansing branch of Schuler Books has closed; however, their Okemos and Grand Rapids locations are still open for business!

In other bookish news, I've suspended my Book of the Month Club subscription, although I do highly recommend the service. Their curation and price point are spot-on; I just found myself more interested in other books I found elsewhere, but don't be surprised if I tell you in the future that I've reactivated my account.

I'm sorry my first post back isn't more exciting than this one, but I hope you find it informative and discover your new favorite bookstore this way!

-Cate-

Food Food Food: The Pumpkin Queen?

If you were suffering under the delusion that my October soufflail would deter me from revisiting that pumpkin cookbook of my mother's, you were wrong. So it happens that the second Food Food Food post starts much like the first: with a can of pumpkin guts.

Look, it's not that I didn't want to move on to different things. I did. But that stupid orange book was taunting me, okay? I couldn't let it defeat me. So I drove to the grocery store in my yoga pants and marched myself around until I found the ingredients for something called a Pumpkin Cream Cheese Pie with Sour Cream Topping.

Let me be clear: this was not a cheesecake. It was closer to the texture of a chocolate silk pie, or maybe a cheesecake if cheesecake came in a semi-wet chiffon variety. I should also tell you now that the recipe called for no pumpkin pie-type spices, only grated lemon peel and vanilla. That felt wrong to me, so I ditched the lemon and substituted ginger and nutmeg (which items we already had at home). 

I felt that I had the advantage this time. There were few ingredients, and everything was simple (i.e., no stiffly beaten anything this time). The sour cream topping was so easy to make that I wasn't sure what to do with the extra time I had, other than taste-test it; it's pretty much my new favorite thing.

That required only sugar, sour cream (I used lite), and a touch of vanilla. I mixed it in a cereal bowl with a fork. It would have taken someone with far fewer skills than I have to mess it up, I think. But I also had a secret weapon: real Mexican vanilla.

I'm not sure we've ever had a brand of vanilla other than Danncy in our house. Mom picks it up in Tijuana when she gets the chance, and a single bottle lasts approximately one million years. The rich brown liquid smells and tastes incredible and smooth, and I highly recommend it.

The pie itself was a cinch, in part because I used a store-bought graham cracker crust. Aside from that, it came together quickly and baked up in about 45 minutes. Before I added the topping, it was a light beige-orange, and it smelled like fall.

Because the crust was threatening to burn, I had to take the pie out of the oven before the topping fully set up, so it was less meringue-like than I suspect it should have been, but it still tasted good. The sour cream added just the right acidic notes to the dessert, and the texture of the pie still felt like a classic pumpkin pie, but overall it was lighter than that more traditional option. 

Although I did feel that the pie itself was a bit on the bland side, I'm happy to report that neither of my parents rejected the endeavor this time (I still can't blame my mom for not wanting to consume the first experiment).

My hope is that I'll continue to focus on seasonal fare, although perhaps in the future my efforts will line up better with my blogging schedule so I'm not consistently behind the times with my posts. If anyone has suggestions or requests, let me know, as I have yet to decide what I'll make next!

-Cate-

PS For copyright purposes, I won't be sharing the exact recipe here, but if you're interested, e-mail me at CateIsMilesAway@gmail.com for more information.